As a gorgeous brown skinned black woman that gets approached by men within a group and alone, also proud that God graced me with a heritage as rich as the kiss that the sun gave my skin, I can honestly confirm with you all that most of us real women want real men, which we usually don’t find from the circle of men that want to “approach” us at 1 a.m. in a club. While being approached or “hollered at” is flattering it’s not necessarily what we came to the club for. Me and my girls go just to have fun once we get off work and are ready to unwind a little after a long week; hos on the other hand do come to continue the unwinding after 2 a.m. and believe me they make themselves very approachable. Most of the men who flip out their sidekick/blackberry and are stacking up names such as vicky w da fat azz in their phone are approaching women to have some fun with when the club doors close also. It’s more than likely that most of the girls that you mentioned who are more approachable are also more willing to continue their drunken frenzy after club hours. Real woman want real men who can approach us at the appropriate time when we are by ourselves not screaming in our ear at a club when we are half naked attempting to grope on our ass. Not that there is anything wrong with them commenting on are attractiveness but they aren’t seeing us for anything more than are hips and thighs in this environment. We are talking about a club where people are packed side by side sweating, with alcohol, and music blasting preventing genuine conversation and not a jazz or poetry club right?

Most of the time we are just there to dance, flirt and have fun, not look for a soul mate. If we want to talk about approachability how bout at a bookstore or record store coming up to us instead of wanting us to unfold our arms so men can drool in our cleavage a little more and wonder if we can F*ck as good as we dance. Trust me I am much more likely to give out my number in a bookstore/recordstore than a club and am probably more approachable there too. If you are more willing to approach women at the club..all of the previously stated in the last paragraph is more than likely why. There is something “in” or on the “club woman” that you like and want to get to know better. Besides who wants prince charming approaching us with funky breath, hard ons while dancing, and wedding bands hidden in their pockets!

Just a little food for thought from experiance

LOL! Dammit Jen that is soooo true! I try to be a nice conversationalist in the club, but I often start getting frustrated because I really have no clue what the hell guys are saying. I’m glad to hear it’s not just my personal issue (although I am still slightly convinced I’m going deaf). I get so tired of shouting over the music “I’m sorry, what did you say” five times in a row and just start to smile, give a half-hearted laugh and nod to whatever he’s saying. Please stop trying to have intense philosophical discussions on the dance floor! Let’s just do our respective mating dances, exchange digits and holla later.

(Shit, did I just admit that I’ve been to Star Trek conventions? :-p)

beautiful kisses
Siobhan

I generally say you can meet people anywhere, up to and including while sitting in a traffic jam on the highway (it was a great conversation LOL), but something about the grocery store just strikes me as hilarious.

I hate grocery shopping so I shop months at a time and the FIRST time a guy approached me while I was dragging two shopping carts I just burst out laughing. I thought the carts made it seem as if I had a family but apparently the guy had been listening to me talk on my mobile and knew I was single…very creepy and still funny.

All and all…you meet people…the world is SMALL! I have met PEOPLE (more than one mind you) who lived down the street from me or my parents in South Carolina HERE IN AFGHANISTAN.

My only non-dating rule is FRIENDS-ONLY in the war zone. When I redeploy THEN I’ll consider more.

beautiful kisses
Siobhan