Three things happened yesterday that made me quite upset:
- I dropped several thousand hackle feathers all the fuck over the floor in my condo
- Walking into the elevator with my headdress and eagle feathers, some stupid chick asked me “OMIGOD ARE YOU A REAL INDIAN?!?!?!”
- I watched Looney Tunes for five fucking hours
Watching Looney Tunes for so damn long reminded me of a cartoon I saw as a child, where Bugs Bunny somehow wound up in what was called “Deepest Darkest Africa” and spent the episode making an ass out of an African native that was drawn to look like an eggplant with feet and a spear. What disturbs me about this memory is that this racist fucking cartoon was aired as late as the early 90’s.
Anyone on this board over the age of 21 or so probably has racist Looney Tunes episodes seared deeply into their memories - which makes the following statement by Wikipedia about the ‘Censored Eleven‘ complete and utter bullshit:
“The ban [on showing the censored 11] has been upheld by UA and the successive owners of the Looney Tunes catalog to this day, and these shorts have not been officially broadcast on television since the late 1960s.”
I specifically remember watching the episode ‘All This and Rabbit Stew‘ several times on cable (I believe the station was TNT) in the early 90’s, and ‘Jungle Jitters’ is probably the episode featuring Deepest Darkest Africa and the eggplant man.
Figure 1: I’ve seen this cartoon before, and I’m pretty sure I wasn’t alive in 1968
What the hell can I say - people were racist as shit back in the day, and the intended audience for Looney Tunes was, as Friz Freeling partially admitted, intended for racist fucking white people. No small wonder that the Warner Brothers, all four of whom were apparently Jewish, still bought the Looney Tunes series despite innumerable negative references to Jews.
For those who want to get mad by experiencing the racism in visual form, enjoy this.
Racism aside, I enjoyed Looney Tunes because it was undeniably fucking hilarious. This is why I was emotionally devastated when I came upon the following:
Figure 2: There is no God
Apparently in 2005, someone took the friendly characters from Looney Tunes (Bugs, Daffy, Wyle E. Coyote, Taz, and the Roadrunner) and injected them with Agent Orange or some shit. Now these clever characters have been reborn as ‘The Loonatics’, who in the image above are depicted as soulless and unnecessarily badass spreaders of the X-treme marketing virus hell bent on leaping out of my computer screen and punching me in the testicles.
Let’s take a look at each of these characters in turn:
1.) Ace Bunny - (pictured at the center) Ace Bunny appears to be the craziest out of the entire group, which is impressive considering that not one character even has pupils. Ace’s tightly clenched fists, inexplicably sharp teeth, scimitar-shaped ears, and what appears to be a twitching right eye symptomatic of severe stress, seem to indicate that the sole purpose of Ace Bunny is to rape your dog and murder your family.
2.) Danger Duck - (bottom left) is actually the most normal-looking of the bunch, in spite of the fact that his soulless eyes are given a red hue to indicate that he’s been to Hell at least once. Danger’s predecessor, Daffy Duck, was fairly lanky, out of shape, and had hands that resembled feathers - but the new Danger duck appears, at least in this image, to be rather broad shouldered and have fists cast of solid bronze. I’ve never seen the cartoon, but I’m pretty sure that at some point Danger has uttered the phrase “feathers are for cunts.”
3.) Tech E. Coyote - (far left) was always green with envy at the Roadrunner in the original cartoon, and for the Loonatics series has been rendered literally so. Recognizing the fact that our children are indeed dumber than ever and have no idea what the word ‘wily’ means (or the ability to associate ‘wile’ as a pun on ‘wild’), the creators apparently made Wyle E. Coyote take a fucking MCSE exam and become Tech E. Coyote - the cheesiness of which is borderline criminal, but nonethless simple enough for our stupid ass uncultured electronically-obsessed fatass children to comprehend.
4.) Slam Tasmanian - (top) has a fist bigger than his fucking head even if you adjust for perspective, (we can only assume he uses that fist to beat unwilling women into submission), and 95% of his face is composed of innumerable gigantic teeth because apparently his character was modeled after Terrell Owens. The enormous size of Slam is not done justice by the above picture, so I’ve included another:
Figure 3: Seriously, dude. There is NO God.
Slam clearly weighs at least a metric ton and is suffering from an X-TREME case of ‘Roid Rage. One can’t help but notice that his transformation from ‘Tazmanian Devil’ in Looney Tunes to ‘Slam Tazmania’ in Loonatics is not at all unlike Barry Bonds’ transformation from man to Silverback Gorilla between 1986 and today, and is therefore a horrible example for our children.
5.) Rev Runner - (far right) is so fucking goddamn X-TREME that he’s the only bird I’ve ever seen with teeth. TEETH ON A BIRD, DUDE. I am willing to bet my life that right now somewhere in the country, some middle schooler is flunking a science test because he sees this question…
- True or False: Birds have teeth
…and then thinks to himself: “AH! REV RUNNER HAS TEETH! TRUE!”
Fail. That child will spend the rest of his life asking people if they’d like to try a combo.
6.) Lexi Bunny - (bottom right) I’m not too sure why they didn’t just cut the bullshit and call her ‘Sexy Bunny’ or ‘Flexibunny’ or ‘Slutty Bunny Cum Bucket’. Is there any coincidence that Lexi is positioned below Ace’s left nut? Anyhow, the creators of the show clearly wanted to introduce sexual tension to the show while a.) maintaining plausible deniability of said introduction, and b.) at the same time assuaging the oh so annoying Girl-Power lobby. To this end, Lexi has been given scythe-like dagger hands that suggest awesome fighting prowess and excruciatingly painful sex all at the same time.
Figure 4: Come back, guys. Please?
Yaaaaayyyyy!!!! Chris is back! Hope you’re feeling better.
I hate the new school spins they put on old school cartoons.. Tom and Jerry (also a racist cartoon) had some shit called the Tom and Jerry Kids, Animaniacs (well.. that was kinda funny) and some other mess I can’t think of at the moment.
Looney Tunes used to be one of my favorite things to watch with my father. Yosimite Sam was a racist bastid but I loved him. Foghorn Leghorn was Black. As was Daffy Duck. Those were my three favorite characters.. I remember watching Jungle Jitters with him and he kept sucking his teeth and he changed the channel but I never knew why.
They were also horrible when it came to anyone from Asian decent, they always had slits for eyes and giant teeth, that much i remember.
Oh, thank you lords of fuckery.
What did you reply to the Einstein in the elevator? Or what did you want to say?
You need to hang out with more fatass children because we watch Invader Zim, Samurai Jack and Pukka around here.
i remember the deepest darkest africa cartoons.
remember when elmer fudd was looking for the dodo?
and he flew his wee lil plane over the continent and it just kept getting darker, and darker… i never knew how to describe the people, but eggplants with legs will suffice. i just remember that all i could see was an insane amount of blinding white teeth.
when i asked my mom why, she just said that all the cartoonists back in the day were bigoted assholes.
don’t even get me started on the mexican references.
…chris i’m dying to know what your response was to the white chick in the elevator.
I am more worried by the racism in the “Lion King” and its subliminal messages.
Did you ever like a cartoon then you start seeing the racism creep over the show?
I pretended that tom and jerry and the obese maid were not really racist because I was by then addicted to the show.
http://stuffgirlslike.wordpress.com
AHAHAHAHAHAH…does anyone remember that scene in ‘Who Framed Roger Rabbit?’ where Daffy Duck and Donald Duck were piano-dueling? Well, Donald got so frustrated with Daffy’s ’shenanigans’ that he called the Black duck what sounded like a muffled N-Word.
My grandma would tell me from childhood how racist those cartoons are…remember those Black crows? Buggs Bunny was cross-dressing asshole anyway. Carrot-eating bastard.
Fail. That child will spend the rest of his life asking people if they’d like to try a combo.
EPIC FAIL. And I can confirm that kids will actually believe this shit.
Slutbucket Cum Bunny???? BWHAHAHAHAHA. My soul needed that!
I remember reading about the Censored Eleven and I DEFINITELY have seen Coal Black and the Seben Dwarves, plus mad other racist ass Looney Tunes. I was too angry a child to watch that and Tom and Jerry with that fucking mammy.
I never liked that crap anyway, it took away valuable Barbie doll and tea party time.
I watched Looney Toons as a kid and loved it. As I got older I was told that Daffy Duck was “black” I became pissed off. Especially since Daffy was always making those crazy noises and jumping all over the place. Never did like Elmer Fudd. Hated his hat and nose. lol
I liked that stupid frog that wouldn’t sing in public.. that was looney tunes, right?!
Rev Runner? I think I know a certain someone who might take issue with that:
Oh don’t get me started on Lion King.
Why is it that the one time Disney makes a movie that’s set in a place in which the human characters would be black, it has no humans?
Ok, ok, Bambi had no humans either. But at least there was a hunter.
Rev Runner?
http://i.realone.com/assets/rn/img/8/2/7/6/8856728-8856731-large.jpg
(please delete my last comment. I forgot the link!)
Damn i saw that episode too when i was little and ofcourse I didnt understand but now that I have seen Looney Tunes as an adult that shit is fucked up but its still funny to me. Like Pepe le Peu that dude is a freakin pervert/ potential rapest! I hate cartoons now! OMGGGGG especially these remakes of old cartoon characters and stuff. The shows these kids have today suck ass!!!! For example Sponge Bob I wanted to strangle myself 5 minutes in to the show watching it with my step-daughter.
I loved the Animaniacs!@ Lady
lol This is great.
My absolute favorite response to the Loonatics.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=Ivzp9wmrcwE&feature=related
Definitely NOT SAFE FOR WORK.
I’m so fucking sad now. I loved Looney Tunes. The monstrocities look like if they hit you with an anvil your head would pop off and they would eat it.
And yes I’ve seen most all of those racist ass cartoons and I was born in the eighties. Also I used to watch Mighty Mouse as a kid (also racist but somehow I still enjoyed it) and I bought a DVD with one Mighty Mouse and some of the most racist cartoons I’ve ever seen. They had this one where 3 white sheep were singing and then get covered in coal dust and all of a sudden their skirts get short and they start singing in deeper (sexier) voices and shit. And I bought this DVD 4 years ago. Bastards tried to be slick slipping that cartoon in with my Mighty Mouse.
Also Pucca is great. An absolute ridiculous cartoon. I used to watch it when it was just a Korean web phenom with MashiMaro which makes a lot less sense to me.
animaniacs were my favorite.
actually most of the cartoons that came on the now defunct WB were good.
hysteria! was hilarious. they need that on dvd.
cartoons themselves have fallen off.
i miss pepper ann.
knatrual-AHAHAHAHAHAH…does anyone remember that scene in ‘Who Framed Roger Rabbit?’ where Daffy Duck and Donald Duck were piano-dueling? Well, Donald got so frustrated with Daffy’s ’shenanigans’ that he called the Black duck what sounded like a muffled N-Word.
My grandma would tell me from childhood how racist those cartoons are…remember those Black crows? Buggs Bunny was cross-dressing asshole anyway. Carrot-eating bastard.
thats is wayyy too funny hahahhahahahhahahah carrot-eating bastard hahhaha i think i know what your talking about in “who framed roger rabbit”. BTW i love that movie too
Dead@ that video Onion
omg hahhahahahahah
I loved Animaniacs and Pinky & the Brain! Cartoons now suck! HARD. Except the more ‘adult’ stuff like Family Guy.
@ Mrs. Epps
The cartoons today are really sad. I started ordering old cartoons on DVD for my son because it’s sad. He loves spongebob, I can’t stand that show..
I mean, not that my fav cartoons were any better as far as my parents were concerned:
Ducktales
Darkwing Duck
He-man
Thundercats
Transformers
Voltron (yes I was a tomboy)..
All the cartoons they have today have some seriously underlying sexual suggestions (patrick and spongebob are gay) and contain a lot of burping, farting, or the ones that cater to girls are all about appearance, being pretty, shopping, getting boys to like you.. I’m like WTF?
The only thing I can stomach is Fairly Odd Parents.. don’t judge me…
fairly odd parents is my shit!!
now i’m gonna be sitting here watching youtube all day instead of working.
Lady-Ducktales
Darkwing Duck
He-man
Thundercats
Transformers
Voltron (yes I was a tomboy)..
HELL YES!!! I loved all those shows! I even watched the Hulk,rugrats and some other stuff i cant think of right now. I miss the kid version of Ninja warrior( wild n crazy kids) sighs…I miss the old Nick and disney. BUt I agree i do like Fairly Odd parents too, I can tolerate that.
YES Lady! I heart you!
Ducktales (how come Scrooge McDuck never broke his neck diving in a vault full of gold?)
He-man & She-ra
Thundercats
Gem (FUCKING LOVED)
Sorry, Jem, Jem and the Holograms!
@ Mrs. Epps don’t get me started on nick game shows… those still come on and I can at least watch those w/ my son and get all nostalgic.
Guts
Double Dare
Legend of the Hidden Temple
I like Rugrats, I can watch that too.
I can go on and on w/ the cartoons.. Garfield, Heathcliff, Ghost busters (even the racist one where the black guy was a gorilla.. and this is in the 80’s!), Rescue Rangers, Inspector Gadget
But Ducktales is/was my ish.. I would be so INTO that show after school you couldnt tell me nothing..
Legends of the Hidden Temple!!
Olmec used to freak me out cause the only thing that moved was his lips.
remember salute your shorts?
i have that on dvd.
that and david the gnome…
oh my childhood.
damn i forgot about Heathcliff and Rescue Rangers I would watch those after school!!
Oh god, Double Dare. That host would irritate me so much. You remember ‘You Can’t Do That on Television’? I loved that show. And Muppet Babies!
Loonatics looks like the least interesting shit ever. I hate modern cartoons and kids shows, minus That’s So Raven (I just love that girl). When my students talk about Hannah Montana I want to shoot them and her and myself. And there is no reason for a 12-year-old Black girl to walk around reading Teen Bop or whatever the fuck the White equivalent of Black Beat is and clipping pictures of Zack And Cody for their lockers. Yuck. What is it with young girls and super effiminate boys?
Reason 40080 that I am NOT ready for motherhood yet. I’d have to drink waaaay toooo much to not kill one of my little ones, and they’d be all “Waaah, waaah. I’m sick of Spike Lee movies, why we can’t watch Spongebob????” and I’d be like “Cause that shit is WACK!”
Fraggle Rock!
*I hate you*
OMGGGGGGGGGGGG Salute your shorts….remeber that show are you affried of the dark and goose bumps!!!
Sheds a tear..i missing the good ol days sighs..
now all there is Hannha Montana, Sponge bob, Dora the explorer, The wiggles(gag).
Muppet. Babies.
The inner child in me just yelped. I LOVED that show.. even though Nanny used to creep me out cause all you could see was her damn socks.
Nice trip down memory lane for all my 80’s (and maybe even 70’s) babies. This is the good stuff.. i didnt watch them all.. but most
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bto7l3cKhvk
Ooooh @ Are you afraid of the dark… that used to scare the crap out of me.. and Goosebumps
The original All That w/ Keenan Thompson, Josh Server n’nem.. in the words of DJ Khaled.. da bessssss
@ Lady
Yay, Darkwing Duck!
Boo, lack of Rescue Rangers, Gargoyles, and Talespin! I loved me some Animaniacs and Tiny Toons, as well. Before that? C.O.P.s.
“It’s crime fighting time.”
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U1kgmIVd9Ow
Heh. I don’t think the quality of cartoons has dropped. It just went from being all ages to being primarily targeted at children. You know those old Merry Melody and Loony Toons episodes were full of double entendre (which is why Animaniacs was so hilarious).
I watch a lot of anime these days. There are still smart and entertaining cartoons being produced. Ghost in the Shell ain’t Sponge Bob.
Just don’t hate on my Pokemon.
A brother has to watch his Pokemon is all I’m saying.
What the hell is wrong with Spongebob?? So, him and Patrick are teh gei for each other, so what? It’s not like they’re buttpumping or anything even close to that, they’re just a couple dorks that revel in their jellyfishing antics. Sheesh, people.
Spongebob, Jimmy Neutron, Grimm and Mandy. There is nothing wrong with some fartin and boogers for kids to laugh about.
You guys are a buncha cranky young ones, honestly.
(I so hate Family Guy and that is my 13 year old’s fave. Every time I have to sit through one I swear my brain dries out a little more)
ALL THAT!!!
i still remember the theme song.
i know that this is showing how old i am, but my aunt took me to see the taping of the pilot of that show.
baggin saggin berry…
remember my brother and me??
Gargoyles YES! I loved that show; it was so dark and they had all those Shakespeare references (yes, I’m a nerd). I’m surprised no one mentioned G.I. Joe! G.I. Joe. G.I. Joe.
Avatar the Last Airbender!!!
We looooove that and just watch those reruns while we wait and wait and WAIT for the next season.
@ Knatural
(how come Scrooge McDuck never broke his neck diving in a vault full of gold?)
It was his special ability. That explained that mess in the Life and Times of Scrooge McDuck comic. You should read that comic. Dude was BAD. ASS.
Sister T-Reason 40080 that I am NOT ready for motherhood yet. I’d have to drink waaaay toooo much to not kill one of my little ones, and they’d be all “Waaah, waaah. I’m sick of Spike Lee movies, why we can’t watch Spongebob????” and I’d be like “Cause that shit is WACK!”
girl your a mess hahahah but i would do the same thing too. Me and my step-daughter last weekend:
Aalicia-I wanna watch cartoons
Me-Girl we havent watched real tv all day but some damn cartoons.
Aalicia-But I wanna watch cartoons thought pleaseeeee
Me- Whats that gotta do with me go play with your moon sand cuz we aint watching no more damn Jimmy Neutron or Hanna Montana
Aalicia- YOUR MEAN IM NOT YOUR FRIEND(smacks my leg) IM TELLING MY DADDY..DADDDDDYYYYYYYY
Me- Tell your daddy what he gonna do and since you got that attitude and rolling your eyes and then hit me put your nose ont he wall.
haha
@ benjie
Temple was brutal. How the hell am I supposed to remember all this?!
http://olmecguide.ytmnd.com/
Few things irk me more than seeing the African continent portrayed as the origin of evil, as a land of violent savages, or, a land of f*ckwits from a decade gone.
You can stop kids from watching racist cartoons. Sadly, you can’t stop universities from propagating Looney Tunes style racism through “classic literature”.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Heart_of_Darkness
@ Lady & Mrs. Epps: Thundercats HOOOO!! I loved that show so much, I was Cheetara for Halloween 3 years ago.
onion-
i used to feel bad for those kids. how do you go from like 6 teams to 2?
yellow monkeys
purple sasquatches
whatever.
then they ask ridiculous questions and make you run around a maze with scary white people dressed up like mayans popping up out of nowhere.
and then, when you won (finally) they gave you a casio keyboard and a bike.
…thats it?
Please please PLEASE tell me this is not still on the air. I didn’t even know they made this cartoon until I saw this post. I think I’m going to go somewhere in the corner of my office and become violently ill…
Temple was the ishhhH lol@ at the site and the tiki voice hahahah
benji-i used to feel bad for those kids. how do you go from like 6 teams to 2?
yellow monkeys
purple sasquatches
whatever.
then they ask ridiculous questions and make you run around a maze with scary white people dressed up like mayans popping up out of nowhere.
and then, when you won (finally) they gave you a casio keyboard and a bike.
…thats it?
thats one of the only reasons i wouldnt want to be on that show if i had the chance cuz of those dumbass prizes.. wtf i want a keyboard for?(i already had one) and I already got a bike hahahha I WANT CASH AND VACATION TICKETS!!
GEM (Absolute must)
Darkwing Duck
Duck Tales
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (complete with my simple ass doing a spin on my back with the opening credits)
Fraggle Rock
The Muppet Show (on occasions)
Muppett Babies
Anamaniacs
WTF was Tiny Toons? So wack.
Is it sad I sometimes watch Muppet Babies and Tom and Jerry in the morning before class?
I’m forever young ya’ll, forever young.
Speaking of old shows, does anyone remember Gummy Bears (the ones that lived in a tree and when they drank that juice they’d bounce all over the place), Salute your Shorts was also a personal favorite, and Are you afraid of the dark? used to scare the beejeezus out of me.
Captain Planet, anyone?
gummmmmmy beaaaaaarrrrs bouncing here and there and everywhere
high adventures that’re beyond compare
they are the gummy bears.
they were sippin syrup
that’s the only explanation i have for the juice that they would drink
Captain Planet, he’s our hero, gonna take polution down to zero…
THE POWER IS YOURS!
*I hate everyone*
Oh snap, how can I forget about Avatar? I love that cartoon.. I consider it more Anime though.. and let’s not go there.. cause I got a list..
Lady heart’s Aapa
Jimmy Neutron is cool too.. even though I get grossed out sometimes.. (talent show booger bubble. that is all)
I guess because I understand more of Spongebob than my son does it gets on my nerves a little.. that subliminal mess ain’t no joke though.. Of course my son’s fav character is Patrick and he went through this period where he thought it was cool to be dumb.. i had to explain to him many times why it’s important to be as smart as you can be.. which is not a problem for me cause I talk to my kids.. but i wonder about the parents who dont and their kids are thinking it’s cool to be dumb as well…
Although i was enthralled during one episode.. I can’t front.. Squidward is that dude..
Captin Planet OMMMGGG yesss and Power Rangers(dont hate)
Ma-Ti was a bitch. What kind of Planeteer power is ‘heart’
Captain Planet’s mullet was scary.
@ Epps
Maaaan double dare was no better.. the prize would be a manual tran station wagon w/ wood paneling on the outside.. wtf?
@ benji - loving how you went back to david the gnome! i loved that show! Is anyone else in here old enough to have watched care bears?
I think there’s value in some of the new stuff on tv. I’ve re-invested myself in cartoons. I do love fairly odd parents, jimmy neutron, and even spongebob. you can’t get better nonsense cartoon sea-coonery anywhere else.
And I absolutely HATE dora and diego. even though my kid likes all the songs. But the great Nick Jr. ish is The Backyardigans. They actually have a character in the show that’s a little ladybug named….. wait for it….. Uniqua!
okay, one last thing and then i seriously need to do some work
remember the black history month episode of captain planet?
kwame and the one with the fire (i forgot his name) were trying to stop the gang violence…
idk why, but that one cracks me up everytime i see it.
lmao @ scary capt’n planet mullet!
gummy bears was the greatest too!
watched carebears faithfully@ scarlet
I felt it necessary to comment on the Backyardigans, because I loooooove that show. They throw down on there….and I watch it even when I’m not babysitting……..
I can’t wait for these elections to be over because now, every time I see and hear Mayor Nutter I just see Squidward “waah waah waah stupid Spoooongebob and all your hoope, yah right.”
I just pointed out to my kids that Patrick lives under a rock. The End. At least Spongebob has a job …. hahahaha, god. Kids are so gullible you can make anything into a lesson.
In hindsight, I argue that Captain Planet himself was a bitch.
How is it that you can throw oil or coal on someone…no, not someone…a superhero - and he can’t take it, and then gives the “power” back to the planeteers?
Sorry, Captain Planet.
The earth is stronger than that.
I would be willing to wager that these racist cartoons are still being shown in other parts of the world like Asia, parts of Europe and Mexico.
And speaking of racist cartoons; has anyone heard of memin penguin?
@ Scarlet
I like Nick Jr.
Max & Ruby … I watch on my own sometimes.. Same with Oswald and Little Bill….. Backyardigans is cute too.. i like their songs..
Don’t judge me..
LMAO @ syrup sippin carebears.
Does anyone remember the show “Small Wonder” with Vicki the robot?
And dare I say…”Beverly Hills Teens”
Did anyone watch Hey Arnold? my son just got a hey arnold sticker from a nurse at his last dr’s appt, and i was like “do kids these days even know about this cartoon?” and then i remembered how i always thought that it was messed up that they made all those little kids in the borough have wierd shaped heads and faces?
@ Lolo - Samurai Jack! I love how seriously that cartoon took himself! Does anyone remember the X-Men Cartoons from the early 90s? THE BEST!
I’m also bout to take yall back to the old school Nick Jr.
Can I get a witness on David the Gnome?
And Carebears was too gey, sorry.
Man, we used to love Max and Ruby. Also? If you ever get a chance, catch George and Martha with the kids. Tooooo funny.
I loved Power Rangers until they got rid of the original cast and started being on some next stuff (like going into outer space, wooooomp) and I so wanted to be a Planeteer, definitely used pretend I was one with my ring pops.
Oh wait I still do that sometimes :o/
Definitely loved Carebears too, and My Little Pony.
@Benjie, I’m glad you sang the theme song, cause I didn’t want to go there.
My little sisters put me on to Avatar, it’s definitely crack, and thanks to them I’m addicted to numerous shows on Cartoon Network.
@ lady, i love my Nick Jr. Backyardigans & max and ruby is my joint! wow wow wubbzy! i like old blues clues with steve, not the other guy they have now. and I’ve come to accept the wonder pets because it’s short.
and i watch yo gabba gabba more like a person watches a train wreck… and because i am almost completely convinced that the dude that plays DJ lance is this dude i went to high school with that was the head of the cheerleading squad! ha ha.
@ Maya -
Yes, I remember Small Wonder.
It came on at like 5 or 6 a.m. down here.
She was so not robotic.
lolo-
he does look like squidward!!!! oh god people would laugh at me cause i said i couldn’t look at him b/c of his massive nose. lmao.
maya-
small wonder was the jawn.
can’t remember the name of this other show…help me.
the daughter was half alien, her father was from another planet. she could stop time with her hands….
Old x-men is the ONLY x-men any kid should be watching. That joint rocked!
I HATED Legends of The Hidden Temple! Boooooring!
TMNT was my shiznit. I had the biggest crush on Raphael. I always go for the assholes. I even had a crush on Peter Vekman from Ghostbusters (not Bill Murray, the cartoon one). I was obsessed with all things Ghostbusters, yo. Anyone remember Bobby Brown’s cameo in Ghostbusters II: “Ay yo, you think y’all can get my little brother one of them proton packs?”! CLASSIC! And “On Our Own” was the closing theme, remember? “Too hot to handle, too cold to hold/They’re called the Ghostbusters and they’re in control….”
And least we not forget Alvin, Simon and Theodore.
I heart Maya! SMALL WONDER, that awful red-and-white dress, and their annoying-ass redheaded neighbor. That’s not a cartoon, though. But I loved that show. That and Charles-In-Charge.
Power Rangers was shitty gayness. If anything was racist, that show was. Why was the Black dude dressed in black, the Asian chick dressed in yellow, and the White chick dressed in pink? I got to old to appreciate the campiness of that show, I think.
Who remembers the Ewoks cartoon!!!!!?????!!!!
Push Pop
Ring Pop
Charms Blow Pop (”…take one, ACTION!” …damn that commercial)
Candy Cigarettes (which I wasn’t allowed to have)
And my personal favorite: Dip Stix
Mmmm sugary goodness.
Oh man, I’m glad I’m not the only one that has a bunch of old cartoons at home. And Sista Toldja don’t worry about the kids, you can do like Lady does and my mom and just make them watch old and worthy cartoons. I’m probably the only person born in the eighties that even knows about Beany and Cecil and thats because my mom thought that was a better cartoon (and what is a better cartoon that lets the characters say ‘what the heck’ every 5 seconds and takes them to an island called Nobikin Atoll).
And I know all the words to the Ducktales theme. I was singing them in car as I drove from Jersey to DC on Tuesday. Huge 8 year old at heart
David the Gnome
Rainbow Brite
Shirttails
Pinwheel
Where in the World is Carmen Sandiego
Fraggle Rock
He-man/She-ra
Ghostwriter
Ghostbusters
Space Ghost (and space ghost coast to coast)
Whatever that show was with gloop and gleep as though big bags of nasal ejaculate that walked around making weird noises in the stone age future… Herculoids was it?
Pretty much anything that came on Cartoon Express (laffalympics all day!)
I could obviously go on and on…
@ benji - i think the show you mean is “out of this world”
samurai jack was great. my husband used to crack up everytime they showed this episode where jack was fighting this bounty hunter and was like “no money for you… crazy round man!” i miss the old cartoon network. power puff girls, dexter, johnny bravo.
“I had the biggest crush on Raphael.”
LMAO @ ST. Thank you for not making me feel weird for liking a cartoon TURTLE, because I had a crush on Michaelangelo. I always like the clowns.
Question of the day, why does Lloyd look like Splinter?
@ Maya: yes for David the Gnome
Bill Nye the Science Guy anyone?
Ghostwriter?
WIld and Crazy Kids?
Gulla Gulla Island?
Why can’t I go back to the 90’s when life was so SIMPLE?!?!
@ lady, i love my Nick Jr. Backyardigans & max and ruby is my joint! wow wow wubbzy! i like old blues clues with steve, not the other guy they have now
Hell yea cause he got them caterpillar eye brows.. them shits scare me..
@ Benjie, you mean out of this world.. i used to watch that.. and Alf
@ ST
I thought i was the only one who had a cartoon crush on Peter from Ghostbusters.. *SO* glad I’m not the only one..
oh and I forgot Kids Incorporated.
OMG… Ghostwriter!!!!! Why did I have a marble copybook so I could do that dumb shit along with them. And the remember when Gaby and that boy started liking each other? And the Asian girl and the black boy I think.
Carmen Sandiego was my shit. I had that game.
Speaking of games, why did I think I was the biggest boss cause I had my Super Nintendo and Street Fighter II. Chun Li was my girl!
OH shit i also had a crush on raphael. How fucked up is it to have a crush on a cartoon turtle. I even liked him in the many animatronic movies. I also had a crush on Gambit from the 90s X-men. That new X-men they have now sucks, much like the new transformers sucked too.
kids in-cor-po-rated.. k.. i… d…. s… yeah!
I saw the PPG movie… in theaters.. Mojo Jojo and n’nem… crazy!!
@Shine, I definitely had a crush on Gambit too. That was my boo and you couldn’t tell me nothing.
Since Maya brought back Street Fighter, was it wrong I stayed up until like 3am one night and watched Mortal Kombat the movie?
“GET OVER HEREEEEEE!!!!”
“Hell yea cause he got them caterpillar eye brows.. them shits scare me..” - Lady
yeah he does! and he seems so scummy! he reminds me of Joey from friends! lol
oh my god. Herculoids. SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP
The 80s everything = the best. I hate all of you for bringing up the best forms of entertainment. Karate Kid, Culture Club, New Edition, Muppet Babies, Fall Guy, TNMT, V the mini-series, Full House, on and on and on. I hate you guys. I’m going to lunch!
Lolo I HEART George and Martha.
Several things are troubling me today.
1. I need to know if Smurfette was truly a whore with white pumps. Why is she the only female on that cartoon.
2. I will kill myself if Dwayne Wade is dating Star Jones.
3. I had not picked up on the racism in Lion King. (weeping and choking myself)
4. Chicken Run is so underrated: Has anyone noticed this is a GREAT movie, the undertones of slavery, “let my chickens goooooo” The plight of the chickens to escape free labor, torture, and imminent death. I actually cried during this movie when the chicken got her head cut off and wept tears of joy when they escaped.
That is a great movie to teach your small children about slavery in a not so horrific way until they are old enough to take the real story.
5. Sister T: I truly missed you yesterday. Not to worry, I went to your blog and got my fill that way. I still like reading your blog AND your shenanigans in here combined.
6. DOUG is by far the most racist cartoon I have seen. Did anyone else notice that every character on that cartoon was “weird looking” except for white Doug and his white girlfriend Patty. They were orange, green, blue, yellow. No black or brown characters. Whats up with that.
My soul is troubled at work….no dwayne…no.
lmao @ maya. he does look like splinter, either him or the rats from secrets of n.i.m.h.
scarlet jones is officiallt my hero! i’ve been trying to think of the name of that show for days now.
samurai jack was my fav. i sat in front of the telly like i wasn’t in college and had better, adult things to do. glued to it.
carmen sandiego was the shit! i had the game on floppy disk at school. it got me through my wee years.
Bill Nye the science guy was a bootleg Mr. Wizard. My middle school science teacher always made us watch that like our middle school math teacher made us watch Donald Duck in Mathland. Mad boring. (much like that damn Fantasia which I am still upset that someone wasted my entire afternoon watching as a child thinking because it was a cartoon it was good). I watched Samurai Jack because the kids I worked with were so into it. It was so slow. I felt ADHD watching it, i couldn’t understand how the anklebiters were into it.
Also I forgot about DangerMouse, Darkwing Duck, Count Duckula, and ALF. My brother gave me the DangerMouse and ALF DVDs for Christmas and my birthday. He is the best brother. I tell that to my other brother all the time.
Umm.. can i just say… Hillary sure does know how to pick em.. I won’t post any links, but just as an FYI George Stephanlopolos or whatever the fuck his name is just got caught out there.. maaajor fuck up.. called the people in Indiana ‘white niggers’ … hmm..
Ok.. carry on..
@ Esquire’s #2: my husband sent me a link to an article about that. i was in my car like ‘what the french toast?’
Stephanopolos is a jerk-off. he talked all that junk about bill after the dynasty was over and now he’s supposedly down with wifey? loser! i’m not surprised he said that shit.
White niggers!!!!???????
@scarlet
I think its not true. But they picked at him yesterday on ESPNS coverage of the game.
(choking on snot and tears)
I will fuck George Snuffalumpagus up.
Scarlet i loved Hey Arnold and Ren and stimpy and Rocko’s Modern Life was my favorite.. I also watched a lot of nick at nite stuff when I love lucy came on n stuff during the summer I like alvin and the chimpunks and chimpettes too.. I live rockbot chicken and courage the cowardly dog now…
Stephanopolos is a jerk-off. he talked all that junk about bill after the dynasty was over and now he’s supposedly down with wifey? loser! i’m not surprised he said that shit.
@Esquire- my friends and I actually analyzed Doug one day and came to the following conclusions:
Doug- manic depressive
Skeeter- weed head
Patti- town whore
Roger- the town drug deal
BeBe- the rich girl, but did lines of coke
Judy- the hippie sister, but clearly we were convinced home girl did shrooms
Still loved that show though, that and Rugrats.
@ Epps - i super heart rocko’s modern life. that was what spongebob is supposed to be, but it misses the mark. rocko and his stupid jerk off friends were comedy all day!
did anybody also watch the angry beavers? that was great too.
remember boring as Johnny Q and Space ghost?
and damn Tamara came with the Gulla Gulla island I loved that show..hahah ya’ll remem reading rainbow?
something I noticed about those racist assed Tom & Jerry cartoons with the mammy character is that they replaced the voice. It’s almost like how they took the red bandanna off of Aunt Jemima: take away a little of the offensive shit but it still stings (and aside from the obvious, how fucked up is it that they didn’t think the rag was offensive until the late 20th century?)
and i’m just busting up in here, messing up the flow of