I’ll admit this up front: I watch Sex & the City.
I don’t watch it, however, because I enjoy the silly comedic moments or the idiot-savant romantic insights of Carrie fucking Bradshaw. Instead, I watch Sex & the City because after working 8 hours in the office and up to another 5 hours at home and spending another 3 hours sewing beads on my dance regalia, there are only three things that can put a smile on my face:
- Sex. I don’t have a girlfriend and I’m too lazy for one night stands, so this is out.
- Pancakes. Under the imminent threat of diabeetus and weight gain, I usually don’t eat bread after noon if I can help it.
- Self-destructive behavior of unreasonable white women. This is the living definition of Sex & the City.
Figure 1: Vaginitus Douchebitchicus Caucasus Maximus Quadruplicus.
I was perfectly content to watch the four unattractive hags* that star in the show blunder their way through life from now until the Rapture. The general unhappiness of these women made me happy enough to overlook the implausibility of four essentially sociopathic women all having very successful careers that involve - get this - dealing with other people.
Then I had an epiphany: Sex & the City is a white woman’s visual manifesto of classism and racism.
For now, I’m going to skip the classism part because if I were to contemplate it long enough, I will lose my shit. So instead I’ll just focus on the flagrant racism in this motherfucking show.
In my memory, there were four black characters who had speaking parts that lasted more than ten damn seconds - and this is where the racism starts. Sex & the City’s conspicuously unrealistic absence of black people in NEW YORK CITY is surpassed only by that of the partial-birth abortion of a show called ‘Friends’. The popularity among white women of these shows combined with the popularity of New York shows us exactly what white women are looking for:
Figure 2: Fuckers.
But let’s get beyond that and look at the few black characters that were in the show.
Brother and Sister: there was an episode where Samantha (the village bicycle of the show) decided to date a black guy. I can’t remember what he did for a living, but I’m pretty sure I remember it involving sports, and he was very successful. He was an all around good guy.
This man had a sister - a very attractive black woman who, I shit you not, spent the entire show yelling, waving her neck, and snapping her fingers at Samantha loudly and in inappropriate venues telling her that she didn’t want to see “another good brother taken by a white girl.” In the end, it was actually the MAN who capitulated to his sister’s wishes and broke up with Samantha.
- What black people see: a white woman taking yet another of the endangered species of good, eligible black men, and the sister rightly getting her brother to come to his senses.
- What white people see: domineering racist ghetto negro wench hates white people for no good reason, and her weak willed negro man-child of a brother is too much of a pussy to stand up to her. Black women are crazy, black men are sissies.
Navy Boy: in one episode, the four Itchy Vaginas come across a bunch of model-worthy male sailors wearing Navy jumpers walking around aimlessly in midtown, because apparently this shit happens all the fucking time. The sailors invite the IVs to some party that night. The main character, Carrie, spends the whole time at the party dancing with some black pretty boy sailor from Louisiana who looks like a shrunken-down version of The Rock wearing a fruity sailor outfit.
At the end of the night, Carrie and The Pebble are talking outside the lounge. Sounding like a lost puppy, the guy asks her, in nearly as many words, “can I please come home with you tonight?” Carrie, who has had uncountably many one night stands with dudes straight out of hotchickswithdouchebags.com, rejects this guy - opting instead to go home and, for all I know, masturbate to videos of black men being attacked with dogs and fire hoses during the March to Montgomery.
- What black people see: black man far and away out of Carrie’s league gets rejected by her for no particular reason at all. Sheer racism (or comeuppance, since overly attractive black men should not be passing up black women to fuck with white girls that look like an incarnate Australopithecus exhibit.)
- What white people see: horny black navy boy is on shore leave and wants to invade the Antarctic. Carrie, who is pure and white as the driven snow, rejects his coontastical advances and remains ever unpenetrated by the black torpedo.
Sports Man: GASP! A RECURRING BLACK CHARACTER! That’s right everybody, Sex & the City featured for several episodes a dark, intelligent, extremely well-paid, highly educated black man with more moral character than Jesus himself…dating Miranda, aka the fugliest of member of the cast, for several weeks.
FIgure 3: I saw her face, and my dick evaporated.
Sports man is called ‘Sports Man’ because he’s an orthopedist for the Knicks. This makes sense because black men can’t be successful unless it either directly or obliquely involves sports. Miranda is constantly getting jealous of Sports Man because all the white cheerleaders on the Knicks are all over his jock. But he remains ever faithful to this red headed sea monster, eventually even popping the ‘L’ word on her. She freaks out, and breaks up with him to make babies with Woody Allen’s ugly twin.
- What black people see: a ferociously attractive, successful, and loyal black man gets his heart farted on by the last living child of the corn in a combination of bullshit, racism, and karma.
- What white people see: the Superman of black people is not good enough even for the ugliest, most judgmental, type A ho-bag in the entire Itchy Vagina Ensemble. Black people are shit. High five!
I can’t fucking take it anymore. It’s time for me to drive to NYC and scalp Sarah Jessica Parker.
Figure 4: Maybe there’s a fourth thing that can put a smile on my face…
*My father hates Sarah Jessica Parker and everything about her. If you ever meet the terrifying man that is my father and you want to immediately make him like you - insult Sarah Jessica Parker. If you want him to LOVE you, call her an “intolerable horse-faced pussy smuggler who belongs in a zoo rather than on television”.
I… cannot… muster… even… a whimper… of a response… BECAUSE I’M LAUGHING SO F*CKING HARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
dlkmnagepil;ujgks.aerngsapoetluigsakj.erngsaoerlhjs,ergbsoerligblsejrk
Thank God! I was picking fights with people all morning. Now I don’t even have time to read this.
i’m a HUGE fan of “Sex in The City” (which my sister always makes fun of me by saying I should be wathing “Girlfriends” instead) - but I still found this post HILARIOUS. I often wondered why there weren’t many/any black people on the show but this didn’t/doesn’t/hasn’t stopped me from watching and enjoying it. Love the part of the post that said what black people saw vs what white people saw…again THE TRUTH.
p.s. black guy #1 that was dating Samantha was an A&R and the black guy dating Miranda was Blair Underwood.
love the blog!
Hold up hold up… I just read this shit three times… and my stomach hurts from laughter!
This dude said said… he saw the red headed girl… and he didn’t just experience shrinkage… THE MOTHER FUCKER CEASED TO HAVE SOLID OR LIQUID PROPERTIES!!!!!!!!! odsfingseil;fgns.gnsldifkgns.dg
THANK YOU Chris. Now I can finally get some shit done today while laughing myself silly over “last living child of the corn” and “pussy smuggler” and what may be my fave, “village bicycle”. Honestly, Carrie and Miranda were the Dickinators, weren’t they? Thank god that the writers never managed to put together an accidental threesome with them and Mr. Big.
I always hated this show and Friends!! How can you tape a show in NYC and there not be ANY black people. Did they shoo them off the sets? Maybe they had security direct all folks who did not pass a paper bag test to walk on the other side of the street….
wow. I always had a love/hate relationship with Sex and the City, for those same reasons. I hate how they blatantly stuck Black characthers in there, probably just to shut us up. Blair Underwood wouldn’t date a mis-shapened redhead, sorry. Unrealistic. Sarah Jessica Parker looks like a foot, as said by Peter Griffin on Family Guy. That chick Charlotte has a real-life sextape by-the-way.
side note: I appreciate that you take time to write these posts, considering all the things you do (or claim to do)
you do need a Black girlfriend; she’ll not only take care of 1 & 2, but maybe even help sew beads.
“..But he remains ever faithful to this red headed sea monster, eventually even popping the ‘L’ word on her…”
*dead*
I nearly spit out my water on the computer screen at work. Chris, you are going to get me fired.
I can’t afford that, this a work study gig.
I agree that the show is stewed garbaj, but 1 of the 4 looks straight. And as a member of the 233 year old US Army, i have no sympathy for that seaman that got blocked. That’s what he gets for being in the navy. HAHA!
(1 of the 4 = the brunette)
wait wait, I just had a visual of Sarah Jessica Parker (or My little pony as some like to refer to her) and I can’t. Not today.
Haysoos take the wheel and drive me far away from here.
I always wondered how in the hell they would put Blair Underwood on that show and have the audacity to have him date Miranda, the fugliest one as you so well put, who has an infant son.. and then fall in love w/ her to boot.
I can’t stand that damn show because like Peter Griffin said, SJP looks like a foot. Her character is a whiny pain in the ass. As far as i know the one who can never find a man (Charlotte) is a PITA as well.. Samantha is a slore and who cares about Miranda..
At least they had THAT many black people on the show though. Friends only had one, and she was on like 2 episodes..
BRILLIANT! Bravo, bravo!
I don’t think the Black men were put on there to appease Black viewers. 1) no one gives a fuck about Black viewers. 2) Most of the Black viewers were women and the LAST thing we were wishing for was more fugly White woman on Black man action!
@Knatural: THE Blair Underwood is married to a sister. But “A Blair Underwood type” would DEFINITELY date a fugly lesbionic chick like Miranda. A lot of brothers would gladly break their chins trying to motorboat her non existant titties.
Jennifer Hudson is in the SITC movie. She slimmed down a bit from Dreamgirls and from what I have seen, rocks a great wardrobe in the film. She will still be a “big girl” compared to those anorexic trollops and I hope she is not the “sassy Black woman”.
i don’t know what’s funnier the fact that you called them “itchy vaginas” or the pussy smuggler comment.
lmao.
my mother hates her too. everytime she sees a commercial, or an ad for her (ugly) clothes she grimaces. HARD.
and then makes random comments about people resembling baboon’s asses and such.
i actually enjoy sex and the city despite the lack of black people on there. for some reason it may me smile to see women i would never meet, living the life i would never lead, wearing shoes i would only be able to afford if i sold my ass and my first born.
blame imperalism. i do.
LOL… New York is diverse, but it is very segregated/racist. The only time you do see black people in the village, at mommy and me, on the upper east side, or any other place they frequent, they are nannies or doormen. The one’s walking past get looked at funny. When you bulidings in white areas, rich white women will wait for you to press the elevator button because they assume youre the clerk.
I was perfectly content two watch the four unattractive hags* that star in the show blunder their way through life from now until the Rapture.
*****************************
Fuck this post! I’m done reading!
*Saunters out like I’m too good to be around common negroes*
This shit was so funny.
You called them IV’s!
I’m sooo about to call all my homegirls that now
Bitches and Hoes just aint gonna cut it anymore
“and I hope she is not the “sassy Black woman”.”
But you know she will be right. I think i heard she was playing an assistant? You know someone is going to ask her to do something and she’s going to have to give someone a side eye, switch her hips extra hard, or give some kind of attitude… cause that’s what we do *snaps my fangers* haaaaay.
oh and remember the sex scene between miranda and blair underwood?
you know that feeling you get when you’ve eaten something bad and you have to shit? you know that cramping, twisting, burning, churning feeling?
yeah
thats how i felt the whole time.
I watched it a few times, it’s just for white people
- http://www.anythingblack.net
This was hilarious! Evaporating Penis? Prize of the year!
I am a huge Sex and the City fan, and can not wait for the movie! Me and my girls have been planning to dress up and get drinks the weekend it opens.
I did notice the covert racism on the show, but for my viewing pleasure I just pretend it doesn’t exist. Its so much easier that way. Sometimes, being black and constantly aware of my blackness is tiring. Sometimes its nice to identify with people on other levels, and S&TC helped me to realize thet women of all races are going through the same bull.
Anywhoo, I thought the sailor dude was latino. Maybe he’s “Creole,” like so many people on here claim to be? (And isnt that just another fancy way to skirt around the fact that they’ve got black blood and nappy roots anyway? )
At least no one has yet said they enjoy Seinfeld………………….
benjie, YES, AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
and he told her he loved her…via a cookie-cake! That’s love.
That show really made me appreciate Blair Underwood’s* acting skills.
*The real Blair Underwood, not his character - thanks Toldja [I thought I was a know-it-all]
I friggin’ love Seinfeld, even after the Michael Richards negro love fest.
I hate myself.
Echo your post Dom!
@ Grimm, I don’t think NY is that racially segregated/diverse. I’ve been black people every where in NYC and the white people don’t usually pay us any mind. I live in a suburb outside outside of NYC that prides itself on racial diversity, but clearly every group (even down to religious groups) lives in a specific area. And there are definitely places that I won’t even venture to because I don’t have time for yt giving me the side eye.
A city I think that definitely fits that bill though is Boston. I visited a friend there and I was like “where are all the black people?” They were far and few to be found.
Haha, I too happen to have enjoyed Seinfeld.
Even Fraiser and Drew Carey, at one point or another - mostly in my broke-ass-cant-afford-cable student days.
Hey there isn’t much hate on here today, must be because its friday
Seinfeld is hilarious, they don’t need Black people
I wonder what genius gave SJP the Garnier Fructis endorsement deal. Obviously those beauty products don’t work!
“I friggin’ love Seinfeld, even after the Michael Richards negro love fest.
I hate myself.”
*pats on the back* It’s all good, while we’re confessing I actually love Friends, I used to *love* Frasier (who aided in giving us the wonder gift of girlfriends! , Will & Grace (another population blackie = zero show).
I could never get into Seinfeld though, I just don’t find any of them funny.
* that should be
(who aided in giving us the wonder gift of girlfriends!
forgot the space, they took it as a real tag lol.
Grrr
*wonderful
and after the sentence should be (sarcasm)
@ DOM- BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Can I be Creole too? I am light-skinned with confused hair, and I am tired of not having any good explination for it. I can learn French and start cooking bengets(SP)?
Voulez voulez coucher et vi fromage biscuits avec moi?
*serious face*
I am just kidding. The Creole people have a very rich history and tradition.
My white friends shoot me looks of horror and disbelief when I tell them I’ve never seen a single episode. I can’t co-sign anything that pretends Sarah Jessica Parker looks even half-way decent, let alone “hot.” I just can’t. Her face is just…disturbing. And, much as I love him, Peter Griffin stole the foot-face joke from Paul Mooney’s stand-up routine.
Chris, you’ll be happy to know Maxim named Sara Jessica Parker the most unattractive woman of the year! I think I have to agree.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2007/10/29/maxim-lists-the-unsexiest_n_70197.html
http://bestparentever.com
“Carrie, who has had uncountably many one night stands with dudes straight out of hotchickswithdouchebags.com, rejects this guy - opting instead to go home and, for all I know, masturbate to videos of black men being attacked with dogs and fire hoses during the March to Montgomery”.
LMAO!!!
*And lmao @ “No one gives a fuck about black viewers”!
Tamara-
TOO TRUE! I live in Boston and can’t believe its so segregated, even though I’ve lived here my entire life.
I came home about a year ago, after graduating, and I know that if I want to get ahead professionally, this is where I need to be. As far as socially, black people are iced out, and I know I’ve got to move if I want to have more than a handful of places to visit on a saturday night. Or if I want to raise kids who have any sense of self pride.
Its good to see you folks talking about DC though, cuz Ive been thinking about makin that move in a year or so. As much as you complain about love and the PG County, you dont know what I would give to be able to leave my house and not feel like the only black person in the whole damn sate!
sarah jessica parker is the ugliest fucking woman in hollywood! with all that money, you’d think she’d be able to do something about that nose. but her face looks like it got run over by a truck, so it wouldn’t matter anyway.
As ugly as everyone think SJP is, she does have a nice body, and so does Kristen Davis… I cant defend Cynthia Nixon though.
Footface has the body of a thirteen year old boy, she smokes, and has bony feet.
@Tamara: What suburb do YOU live in? Maybe Hempstead…but lets not get into diverse just meaning lots of black people.
Also Chris…how are you just gonna act like Merri Lee didn’t just play you?? She caught your spelling error and nearly hyena-ed you. OOH.
My dad, being the Masochist that he is, watched SATC all the time. And he would look at it in disbelief: “Sarah Jessica Parker is not sexy! She looks like a horse that fucked a cockroach!” is what he would say.
The guy that played that creole sailor was Daniel Sunjata. He is Black/German/Irish.
I HATE HATE HATE ‘Friends’. I thought that show was a blatant rip-off of ‘Living Single’, so I could never really get into that show. Matter of fact, I think both shows were created by the same studio, Warner Brothers. Jennifer Anniston looks like a beat-up cocker-spaniel to me too.
I loved Fraiser though. All the snobbery on that show cracked me up.
I have to confess, one of my favorite YT shows is still “Roseanne”, well at least the 4th-7th seasons before Roseanne’s egotistical ass took over and totally ruined the show.
Roseanne was that ish…
Friends =/= Living Single, i never got that from the show… where are the similarities?
Hmm.. two guys that live upstairs.. two guys that live next door..
One of the guys from upstairs/next do fall in love/marry the girl from downstairs/across the hall..
That’s all I can come up with… so far.. but let me know what you got.
“As ugly as everyone think SJP is, she does have a nice body…”
Her body is absolutely atrocious. She looks like a survivor of Andersonville. Sex with her would be like making love to a bag of charcoal. The girl is just too damn skinny.
Not to say that I dig fat chicks; I personally like mine right in between. But in the words of The Devil:
“Fat chicks are like scooters. They’re fun to ride, but you don’t want your buddies to catch you on one.”
If you want to see REAL segregation, come down to SC.
We dont even PRETEND to be racially diverse. There’s “private clubs” blacks and “others” (which means hispanics because we have little else) cant even get into.
Which leads me back to my natural hair comments…
Woody Allen IS the ugly twin
Kristin Davis/Charlotte did always have a decent ass for a white girl, and from those photos her ex-boyfriend released, she isn’t afraid to step up to the mic, but that’s neither here nor there, cause she seems annoying.
@ Lady: To me, the similarities between the two shows came from folks in their 20’s finding their way in NYC. Living Single had more of a female perspective than Friends. They just seemed to tweak the formula just so, but I could definitely see it.
scooters…lol ooooh you are really gonna catch it now…
Point of correction (because I’m a SITC nerd / fan, despite having some serious beefs with the show, and they’re basically what you have outlined above):
“male sailors wearing Navy jumpers walking around aimlessly in midtown, because apparently this shit happens all the fucking time.”
No, not all the time, just during Fleet Week, which is when that particular episode takes place.
Point of clarification:
the guy asks her, in nearly as many words, “can I please come home with you tonight?”
The guy was also like 22. I stopped wanting to f*ck 22 when I was 24. Young is not sexy. Desperate and young even less so.
I’ll also vouch for the world that SITC inhabits. NYC really is that segregated that in some parts of town you do not see black folks who aren’t on the periphery if they are there at all. (Now that I think about it, what’s up with the now-cancelled “Girlfriends”? No Asians or Latins on a show set in L.A.?)
That said, they still could have done better than the finger snapping sister complaining about white girls taking all the ‘good brothas.’
Okay, I am now taking my overly analytical a** back to my corner.
I thought Girlfriends was kinda wack. The writing was terrible and I hated that ugly man who was always there.
“Fat chicks are like scooters. They’re fun to ride, but you don’t want your buddies to catch you on one.”
rotflmbao.
oh god… that brought a tear to my eye.
my fav show of all time is married with children. it was completely un-pc. i learned to hate the french because of al bundy.
Her body is absolutely atrocious…Sex with her would be like making love to a bag of charcoal. The girl is just too damn skinny-Chris
Dag Chris. How do you really feel? Everyone says they want someone in between until she gets pregnant/lazy and ventures across that thin line… Thats when they start cheating with a skinny chick.
Did you really mean small waist and a fat butt??
Girlfriends is/was a waste of airtime.
That is all.
Frasier = Best show ever with no black people. But it takes place in Seattle so rightfully so.
Blair Underwood and Miranda….. Blair Underwood and Miranda…. the humanity.
It’s about time someone indentified Sara Jessica Parker as the missing link, she’s been walking amoungst us unchecked for far to long.
“Did you really mean small waist and a fat butt??”
I mean small waist and PHAT butt. Fat is completely unacceptable. I don’t want people thinking I’m smuggling Cubans into the country in my lady’s bum-haunches.
Married With Children was tha SHYT!!!!!
SJP did one good thing for me….
inspired me to wear heels more often.
@Chris
*orders baby blue casket in preparation for impending death*
OMFG…went through this post again and almost died of laughter within 2 paragraphs
* What black people see: black man far and away out of Carrie’s league gets rejected by her for no particular reason at all. Sheer racism (or comeuppance, since overly attractive black men should not be passing up black women to fuck with white girls that look like an incarnate Australopithecus exhibit.)
* What white people see: horny black navy boy is on shore leave and wants to invade the Antarctic. Carrie, who is pure and white as the driven snow, rejects his coontastical advances and remains ever unpenetrated by the black torpedo.
Coontastical….LOL
That Blair Underwood and Miranda thing did not shock me at all. I have seen some fine as hell black men with some ugly pinched looking white women all over New York - that shit is an epidemic in park slope - the mecca of interracial couples.
And yes there are plenty of places in Ny where the caste system is in full effect and you only see people of color as janitors and nannies, so in the world they rolled in, that is true.
And yes! I loved Frasier too, I actually care about what books people have read, there is nothing wrong with having education and reading requirements. He cracked me - Niles too.
Chris, I need you to understand something here…I study for the USMLE Step1 6-8 hours a day these days and I die a little bit each day…but you REVIVE ME!!!!
Hence the marriage proposal from before. Dude, Im sooo super serious ( you have me alliteration-ing even)
this made me guffaw!!!! thanks:-)
@ Voodoo- Man, many a day has been tainted by venturing over to Park Slope and Ft Greene and seeing some brother with some foot faced White gal. That, among other reasons, is why I am happy to live in Bed Stuy! Give me Pookie and Nay Nay and Dawn (that is my block crackhead’s name) over Miranda and Blair anyday!
(D)
Too fuckin’ funny
Between the “coontastical adventures”, your dick evaporating at the sight of miranda’s face, and the pussy smuggler , I nearly died!
i can’t breathe. LMAO!
I love the show but I think it’s mostly because I’m a New Yorker in DC missing the hell out of NYC. And as racist as they were, those b*tches wore some bad ass shoes.
Anyone find it kind of funny that some of the “beaus” in real life like black women? case in point: Chris Noth and Halle Berry’s baby daddy.
by far your funniest post yet. LMAO!!!!
*rolls over*
*dies*
co-sign Benji on your posts!!!
and LOL!!!!!!! at your sewing on beads for three hours! THe visual!!! cursing..swearing…achy fingers!!!
If they made a show about my life, the only White people on it would be co-workers, some of my former instructors and my late grandmother. Perhaps the police as well. And the New Kids On The Block.
don’t even get me started on the new kids…
i’m tempted to go to their concert in east rutherford, n.j
but miley cyrus is gonna be there.
and i’d rather eat my own shit than see her.
*hanging my head in shame*…i never missed an episode of sex and the city but in my defense, i had gay, white guy roommate at the time and this was a sunday night ritual for us…
this is hilarious shit you wrote and so true…i did always wonder why in all of nyc these 4 sluts didn’t diversity their dating pool and was so over it when they chose blair underwood’s character to become involved with the fugliest one of the bunch…
I have some royal blue rubber riding boots by sarah jessica parker’s clothing line
Silence
@ TBW- That sounds cute! I went all the way to some wack mall in Manhattan to check out her line, and all the cute ish was gone. I forgot all about it, cause that was last summer. I may try again.
I also own the full dvd set of every season of this show (my college buddy used to work at blockbuster and hooked me the fuck up)
And…
I sometimes watch episodes on On-Demand just because
More Silence
@ Sista
Girl they are fly. I be wearing them bitches, and always get compliments. I got em’ in Orange County in some promenade type thing.
Rubber shoes and nope it aint raining. Only in America (Cali)
HAHA nice post, some of the girls I know swear by this retarded show and move to NY thinking that life is like that - it sets up chicks for a horrible reality check.
Things I hate:
1) As mentioned, no diversity in their casting.
2) These girls have high-paying jobs, but are never in the office.
3) Their outrageously large apartments - yes, i’m jealous.
4) Constant plug of named brands I have never heard before.
5) In general, gives a horrible perspective on what life is really like in the Apple.
Basically people who earn that much money, don’t have time to have 3 hour lunches everyday to shoot the sh~t
i live in boston..roxbury to be exact…and we are here…but boston is has always been segregated…although now, roxbury, which was once primarily a “black”area is starting to diversify…every day i see some white person jogging or walking their dog through the neighborhood…
now if you want to talk about where the black ain’t…i lived in phoenix, az for 14 years…( i just moved back to boston last year)…when i would see a black person, i would beeline over just to say “hello, you’re not alone”…
yes, there are black people in boston..i should know because i ride the bus home with them and am subjected to all that loud talking and the low riding pants every day and night…for goodness sakes, a brother got on the bus last night with a chicken wing hanging out of his mouth!
that is all…
Black People Have No Future, Reason 4,080
Some STUPID ASS Newark kid just tried to break in my car with a fork.
I’m going back to Brooklyn, where it’s safe. Good night.
@Miss Ray, I live in Rockland. I’m not talking about just talking about black being divers; I’m talking internationally. We have people from all over, Latin American/Hispanic immigrants, Africans, the Caribbean, European immigrants etc.
(sorry for the delayed response, I was at work)
He.
said.
his.
dick.
evaporated.
*dead*
*revived*
*reads again*
*Dies again*
Chris, really. I need you to be with me so you can teach me more about my Native American heritage and stuff. The sex will just be a extra…
I have never seen SATC. I have no desire to see any episodes nor the movie. I couldn’t really get into Girlfriends, either, I guess I just couldn’t relate to any of the characters. I did like to stare at Khalil Kane, though, I’ve loved him since he was Raheem.
What was I saying? Oh, yeah. A sistah DOES watch Will and Grace (I wanna be Karen when I grow up) and Frasier, though. And I will stop what I am doing to watch Living Single (which was the inspiration for Friends, IMO) and A Different World.
OK, alright. I love sex and the city, sue me, I’m an itchy vagina too! (your def of a woman with issues) And as in many cases of successful white shows, they invariably always imulate a previous black show or imulate black people. It’ s like Bill Clinton being the first black president.(Let just chill out). The only modern show that was really about white people was Seinfeld and I am not sure that was really about white people or something black made white again. Anyway, it is not just SATC, but 90 % of all media in american caters to white society. Television being number 1 in visual consumption, next cable, magazine, newspapers and radio! BTW, they neva eva eva show that episode when Samantha is dating that black man, so if you don’t have it in on dvd, you wont see it.
This….is so effing hilarious that I just about peed myself reading it. 10 out of 10, sir…
And for the record, they could have at the very least picked AT LEAST ONE mildly attractive woman for the cast. Sarah Jessica Parker is so busted it makes my uvula hurt.
LMAO! SATC was my favorite show when it was on-air. Now I can’t stand it for these very reasons. This show exists in an alternate world where there are no minorities in NYC and you can fuckin’ afford Jimmy Choo Manolo Blanik shoes in an NYC apartment on a writer’s salary. As a writer, I must say: FUCK HBO.
OMFG…the “Black Dude” was played by Blair M.F. Underwood!?!?
F*****************************CK! F*** BLAIR UNDERWOOD!! I CAN’T STAND THAT MF’ER!!!
I couldn’t get into SATC because I lived on campus in college. The dorms didn’t get HBO; the only place on campus that did was the convent. Watching SATC with nuns is…awkward, and I couldn’t figure out why they were laughing at the sex jokes.
Good gracious I missed alot. I do agree… Sarah Jessica Parker used to look good… but age has been far from nice to her. And I cannot get with her voice… I dunno what it is… but the whiney feline sounds that escape her mouth cause the hair on my neck to stand up.
I’m waiting for the crossover movie where Sex and the City meets Entourage. Good god that would be a mess.
I loved Sex and the City when it was on and I have the pink velvet case with every episode and extras…I like Carrie’s character and I really don’t think Miranda is the ugliest one. I think that goes for miss Sarah Jessica Parker and her horseface with the ginormous wart.
Although, to be honest, most women go through a time in their lives when they are exactly like one of those women, black/white/purple whatever.
Damn, as much ho’ing as was going on there I thought there’d be more blacks than that. No temporary black girlfriend storyline at all I suppose.
SITC’s brunette isnt bad but I never got with that show or Friends as a black male. Some of the (mostly white/asian) girls around Houston who havent actually been to NYC really do think thats how life is.
I remember leaving the underground bbq joint at U of Houston w/a friend a few yrs back when a group of young Asians ran past us towards the tv. We thought something major was happening: war or famous death-related, Yao got hurt or something.
No, it just turns out that the group of 5 women and 2 guys wanted to catch the opening credit of Friends. I stood there amazed wondering what the chances were of a similar group of whites doing the same over a show about 6 Asian 20-somethings in NYC.
Aisha Tyler on Friends doesnt count, I saw the promos & an interview she did proudly proclaiming to be “the 1st Afro-American love interest on Friends.” I think her character was ping-ponged between Greg Kinnear & one of the regular cast. I guess she’s the ‘go-to-gal’ for such things now.
Many of the shows on US tv are adapted (if not straight ripped off foreign tv), I also thought Friends looked a bit Living Single-ish.
@ NotBlonde
“Although, to be honest, most women go through a time in their lives when they are exactly like one of those women, black/white/purple whatever.”
Oh Cheese and Rice I hope not. I remember when that sess pool of a show first came on the tele, I asked my friends to shoot me if my life ever turned into that in my 30s. Loveless and jumping from bed to bed with one crazy bastard to the next, no thanks. And if the fantasy life isn’t crazy enough on a daily basis those girls go on long walks through the city wearing those super high heeled shoes. That’s why the men are so confused about how real life should be.
Hey the twin towers are still in that new york sky line. Oh “my” pretty city, before W.H.O blew up America.
Hmmm off topic but I’ll share (then again not really)
Somebody Blew Up America by Amiri Baraka
http://www.amiribaraka.com/blew.html
At one point and time n my life I watched sex and the city all the time…and news flash I’m BLACK…….I enjoyed the situtations they went through and if u ask me they were playin everyday people because everyone n the world r not beautiful and 4 them 2 find unattractive chacters was prefect…….. and if ur going 2 voice how u feel bout white shows not having black people on them then u should be sayin the same 4 girlfriends and y there r not many white people on them….other then when jon bestfriend got married 2 a white guy and she was going 2 have a baby and some other n there twisted marriage he left her but no one talks about white men takin our black women….tis world is so one sided……tsh tsh……
Yes well in the real world unattractive people don’t have that much sex.
This guy would have made a better Miranda:
http://www.break.com/index/worst-spiderman-ever.html
Yes well in the real world unattractive people don’t have that much sex-anmarie
In the real world unattractive people have the most sex… They develope some sort of talent (funny, smart, good at giving head etc.) and get the word out. I know more than a few unattractive people who were always the down low bust it baby or cum bucket to someone in a relationship with an attractive person. As they say “show me a beautiful woman and I’ll show you a man that’s tired of sleeping with her”
This is what happens to people who state the obvious:
http://www.break.com/index/compilation-of-reporters-getting-owned.html
ahahahahaha cum bucket. so poetic.
Not sure if it was mentioned but the chicks on Girlfriends weren’t that cute either. Sure Joan has a huge ass, but those bug eyes are scary. Maya’s unbeweavably bony, and Toni’s attitude made her ugly. Lynn (sp?) was the cutest, albeit the craziest. Ok that’s enough of being shallow and judgmental for now.
It seems like any show with 3 or more white women under 40 is unbearable to watch. Although I love Designing Women and The Golden Girls.
Frasier did have one black woman that was in more than one episode-Kim Coles from Living Single. She played his co-host and of course she talked too damn much.
This is what happens to militant women who hate their jobs and need therapy
http://www.xmission.com/~rowan/Crazy_Cat_Lady.jpg
Glad the party is still rolling, cause I may be staying in tonight. I’s tired.
Girlfriends was HORRIBLE! They had some great story lines, but the writing was soooo painfully bad. Maya was just…a mess. Saying “Gurrrrrl” before everything and “okaaaaaay?” afterwards does not make it funny. The only thing I liked about that show was Maya’s husband, who was cute and Lynn, the Lisa Bonet/Denise Huxtable for the next generation. Oh, and Toni calling Maya’s baby everything under the sun but his name was funny. Beyond that, bleeeeech.
Living Single was and is the shiznit and I like Friends too, even though it stole LS’s premise and eventually, it’s timeslot. Kyle Barker was the gayyest man on televison before Queer Eye. I loved how they acted like that wasn’t the case. He was a CHOIR DIRECTOR for Godsakes!
ROTmflo’!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
@business woman &#